10-10-10

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Decisions! Decisions! Decisions! How do you make decisions? Are you filled with angst when faced with dilemmas? Do you analyze every aspect of your choices? Do you list the pros and cons of various scenarios? Do you consider the consequences?

In her book 10-10-10: A Life Transforming Idea, Suzy Welch offers a simple to use tool for making decisions. She says that when facing a dilemma, ask yourself three questions: What are the consequences of my decision in 10 minutes? In 10 months? And in 10 years? Then she provides stories from her experiences and those of other 10-10-10 users that support the method. Welch cautions that before implementing the strategy, you should clarify your goals and values so that you fully understand the implications of your decisions.

Here’s how it works.
Step 1 - Every 10-10-10 process begins with a question. For example - Should I quit my job? Should I buy the house? Should I stay in my relationship?
Step 2 - Then examine the consequences of each option in 10 minutes, 10 months, and 10 years. The 10-10-10 doesn’t have to be taken literally but can stand for the short term, mid-term, and long term.
Step 3 - Finally, consider the options and consequences with your values, beliefs, goals, and dreams. Which decision helps you create the life you really long for?

Welch provides scenarios of people that successfully used the system. One parent used it to address the dilemma of attending the funeral of a relative she barely knew. Her conflict was between showing respect to her mother’s family and fulfilling some duties for her children. A young man used it to determine if he should work with his wife in a business venture.

10-10-10 is a good strategy that can bring clarity to dilemmas both at home and work. What I like about it is that it requires you to assess your values. As Christians, we should not neglect the importance of prayer, Bible study, and the counsel of wise friends in making decisions. The Bible doesn’t address every specific decision we might make in our lifetime, but it does provide us direction: ask God; seek wise counsel; do all in Jesus’ name; give thanks.

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. James 1:5

Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed. Proverbs 15:22

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Colossians 1:17

We can employ 10-10-10 as another powerful tool to make sure we are living according to God’s principles. The key is to evaluate our life dilemmas by using biblical principles as our measuring stick. For example, we might ask such questions as, will the words I speak or the actions I take matter in 10 days, in 10 months, and 10 years? Will it matter in eternity? Welch’s strategy becomes a 10-10-10-Eternal one. That's truly life transforming!

Shalom

Monday, May 18, 2009

Are there people in your world that just plain bug you? Is there someone who is your “thorn in the flesh?” Is there someone who frustrates you, rains on your parade, or tries to ruin your day? You are not alone! Almost all of us have dealt with annoying people in our personal or professional life. “Annoyers” are people who have personalities, habits, and behavior patterns that you find irritating. Unfortunately, some of us have dealt with adversaries as well. Some adversaries see you as an obstacle to getting something they want. Emotional adversaries are needy people who suck the energy out of others. They often pout, gossip, and play power games. Then there are really difficult adversaries who clearly don’t like you and can even be vengeful. The way we respond to these “annoyers” and adversaries is a measure of our patience, self-discipline, and even our spiritual maturity.

I have struggled with how to deal with both annoying people and with adversaries in my life. My dad always says, “Kill ‘em with kindness.” Some of you might say it would be easier just to implement the first two words of that adage! Then again, that’s not the Christ-like thing to do, is it! In the past week it seemed everywhere I turned someone was sharing a story with me about an adversary. During thesame week one scripture passage was presented to me three different times: twice on the radio and once in my daily devotional book.

If you bite and devour one another, watch out, or you will be consumed by one another. Galatians 5:15

The word bite means to thwart or frustrate or ruin. Think of it as “sinking your teeth into someone.” Ouch! In other words, if someone “bites” us and we “bite” back, we are in danger of being totally consumed by conflict. To further see the point Paul is making, we need to look at the scripture before and after this verse.

Love your neighbor as yourself. Galatians 5:14

Paul cites Jesus’ second commandment to us. Then he goes on to warn the Galatians in verses 16-26 not to follow the desires of the flesh but to walk by the spirit. Our flesh tells us to “bite” back, but the spirit tells us to be filled with the fruits of the spirit.

In his radio broadcast last week, Louis Palau talked about “Shalom.” This Hebrew greeting means “peace” and was said as people met or departed from one another. Palau reminds us that shalom is more than the absence of conflict. It is what we wish for our children. Shalom is the best. It is success. It is the most complete GOOD that we can imagine. It’s easy to want shalom for those we love, but wanting that for our adversaries is another story, isn’t it!

Straight from the words of Jesus in Matthew 5:44 we read, ‘But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” How can we love and pray for someone who is against us? It goes against our nature!

This week …
Let’s think on the word “shalom.”
Then let’s imagine the peace that we desire for ourselves and those we love.
Let’s pray for God to grace us with shalom.
Then let’s face the biggest challenge.
Let’s pray for our enemies, our “annoyers,” our adversaries
Let’s pray shalom on their lives.
Finally, let’s pray for God to change our hearts because we can’t change others; we can only change ourselves.

Shalom!

Sayin' Grace

Monday, May 11, 2009

On a recent visit to Charleston, South Carolina, I was given The Ultimate Gullah Cookbook. The Gullah are African Americans who live in the Low Country of South Carolina. They speak an English-based creole language and are known for preserving their African linguistic and cultural heritage. One of the highlights to a visit to Charleston is seeing Gullah women weaving the beautiful sweetgrass baskets at the Charleston Market.

Sayin’ grace is an important part of the Gullah heritage. The authors says its purpose it “establish a spiritual connection between the food and its consumers. It is a call for the bless’uh da hans’ whut mek da food.”

It is safe to say that almost all spiritual practices have some form of ritual blessing as an integral part of food preparation and eating. Blessings on food are prayers to thank God for providing sustenance and to ask his blessings both on the food, those who prepared it, and those who share it. The duty of saying grace after the meal is derived from Deuteronomy 8:10: "And thou shalt eat and be satisfied and shalt bless the Lord thy God for the goodly land which he has given thee." The Jewish Talmud says, "One who derives benefit from this world without first making a blessing is guilty of sinfully stealing from God.” Therefore, it says every Jew needs to make a proper blessing before eating any food and after finishing his food. One Jewish author commented that there were 100s of opportunities every day to say grace. That sounds like a lot of eating and a lot of blessing!

Saying grace continues in the New Testament. When feeding the multitudes, Christ gave thanks for sustenance (Matt. 15:35-36) and blessed it (Matt. 14:19). Paul taught that food was to be received with prayer and thanksgiving (1 Tim. 4:3-5). The most well known example of saying grace was at the Last Supper when Jesus said, “This is my body which is given for you. This do you in remembrance of me.” And he took bread and gave thanks.” (Luke 22:19-20)

Let’s remember to pause at every meal in thanks for our food. You might try the Gullah version of sayin' grace:

Gawd beena great and e beena good
En we da tank e for we food
By e hand we be fed
Gi us Gawd we daily bread
Amen

You can enjoy sayin’ grace before savoring this delicious ...

Gullah Corn Pudding
1 can cream corn or 1 pint corn scraped from cob
1 can whole kernel corn
2 large eggs (beaten)
1 cup evaporated milk
1 stick butter (melted)
1 tsp nutmeg
1 tsp cinnamon
2 Tbsp sugar

Prepare oven 350 degrees. Mix all ingredients together well. Taste. Add additional seasonings and sugar if desired. (Gullah feel that dishes must have a certain taste to be considered praise worthy and always sample before cooking or serving so they can add a dash or dollop.) Place in casserole dish and bake in oven until brown and firm. About 30 minutes. Do not overcook. Serve hot. Serves 6.

Boundaries

Monday, May 4, 2009

When my sons were younger, we had a beautiful golden retriever that had the run of our fenced in back yard. Scout seemed to live with constant temptation. He found interesting ways to leave the boundaries of the fence. He would find a spot to dig and crawl under it and run lose violating the rules of the neighborhood and risking getting hit by a car. We even installed an invisible fence, but Scout just dug deeper and managed an escape anyway. Each time he’d break free, we’d chase him around the neighborhood and literally drag him back to the safe confines of the back yard. Scout had trouble staying in his yard. Scout had trouble with boundaries.

I am leading two groups right now through a study of Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. The book is generating some thought-provoking discussions about living in boundaries. The authors tell us boundaries help us keep the good in and the bad out. It seems we all have some issue when it comes to living in boundaries with friends, family, co-workers, God, or ourselves. It is reassuring to know that the concept of boundaries actually comes from God. Through his Word, God defines himself and tells us his expectations for living in relationship with him and others.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart

and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,

and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5 & 6

Cloud and Townsend remind us that God sets the boundaries of his “yard.” We know what he permits in the “yard.” He tells us what he allows and doesn’t allow, what he likes and doesn’t like. He opens the gate and invites us into his house and shares his unending love with us. At the same time, God guards his house and doesn’t allow evil inside it. When we sin, he confronts us and allows us to suffer the consequences. When we move beyond his limits, the gates of his boundaries close and we lose fellowship with him. Then when we face our sins and ask forgiveness, the gates open once again and we are restored to fellowship with him.

We were created in God’s own image. God wants us to develop our own boundaries so that we can live in peace and fellowship with him and with others. Boundaries are our property lines in all areas of our life: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Setting boundaries brings health to our relationships. When we have mature boundaries, we can move steadily and peacefully in our faith walk.

What do you allow in your “yard?”
Are you like Scout and move beyond the boundaries of God’s yard?

Let’s follow God’s boundaries and then develop boundaries like his.

To comment, click on the title "Boundaries." Then scroll down the page to add a comment.

Hope

Monday, April 27, 2009

I was introduced to Norman Vincent Peale’s book, The Power of Positive Thinking, many years ago and its principles have had a profound effect on my life. Dr. Peale emphasized applying faith in daily life in order to overcome life’s problems and to seize opportunities. Peale confessed that as a youth he had "the worst inferiority complex of all," so he developed his positive thinking/positive confession philosophy just to help himself. You see, he found hope; he held on to hope; then he handed out hope. He said, “The person who sends out positive thoughts activates the world around him positively and draws back to himself positive results.”

He was a possibilitarian.
How can we hand out hope? How can we become possibilitarians?

I’d like to share 5 S words that will help us to hand out hope:

Share, Smile, Speak, Send, and Show

S #1 - Share Love
Christ gave us 2 very important commandments. “Love the Lord your God with all your heart with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. The second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.” The greatest form of love is agape love, a love that is from God and is meant to be shared. It is an empathetic love.
You may be familiar with the song, "Share the Love."
So many people hopeless, so many live in fear,
They wander in darkness, they cry a lonely tear.

So many people hurting, and it seems nobody cares;

But you can be the difference with all the love you share.

The following list of S words will show us how to share love.

S # 2 – Simply Smile
Proverbs 15:13 tells us, “A happy heart makes the face cheerful.” We can begin handing out hope with a smile A smile is the universal symbol for happiness or joy. A smile crosses all language barriers.

I have experienced much joy and much sadness in my life through cancer, divorce, an injured child, the death of my brother and then the death of a spouse. I know that behind many smiles lie a thousand sorrows. Yet giving a smile has been a way I’ve chosen to spread hope. A smile can give you a happiness boost and others a happiness boost.

S #3 - Speak Encouragement:
Ephesians 4:29 tell us, “Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.”
Athletic teams have a home court advantage when they hear thousands of fans cheering them on. We’re like that too. Sometimes we need the home court advantage. Sometimes we just need someone to tell us “Go!, You can do it! Run to the finish line! You can score! You’re the one! You’re special!, You’re important!” To encourage is to inspire someone with courage. Mark Twain said he could live 2 months on a compliment. When we speak a word of encouragement, we are giving someone extra courage to do something, try something, or find hope in something.

S #4 - Send Notes:
I received a note from a really new friend not too long ago with this scripture, Psalm 16:9, “I’m happy from the inside out and from the outside in.” Don’t you know that brightened my day!
Tell someone you’re praying for her. You can write a specific Scriptures as a prayer. Romans 15:13, "[I pray that] the God of hope [will] fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

S #5 - Show Kindness
We can take the advice of John Wesley
Do all the good you can

By all the means you can

In all the ways you can

In all the places you can

At all the times you can

To all the people you can

As long as ever you can!

Kindness may mean a warm hug, quality time spent with someone, a home cooked meal, or a book of stamps. I’ll never forget that after my husband’s death, my sweet neighbor who had been a widow herself came to my house with a roll of stamps. “Honey, she said, you’ll need them.” A simple, but meaningful act of kindness.

It's an interesting fact of history that the Romans confused the Greek word "christos" (Christ), with the word "chrestos," which means "kind". They sometimes said the word for “kind” when they meant the word for “Christ.” What a beautiful way to transpose words. See how many people you can confuse this week with Christ and kindness.

We have a choice each day. We can put on the glasses of hope or the glasses of despair. We can choose to look for a future good. Or we can live in the darkness and gloom of the present. Ladies, let’s learn to heal our brokenness with hope. Let’s hold on to that hope through good times and bad. Then let’s handout that hope.

In the words of Norman Vincent Peale, "Hope! What a wonderful word it is! Write it indelibly on your mind. H-O-P-E. It is a bright word, shining and scintillating and dynamic, forward looking, full o courage and optimism. With this word, let us begin tomorrow."

This devotion is a portion of a speech I gave at a ladies luncheon. You may hear the speech by clicking on this link - http://christplace.org/pdfs/CathysTalk.WMA

To post a comment -- Click on the title of this blog, "Hope," at the top of the page. When the new page appears, scroll to the bottom and make a comment.

Make Me an Instrument

Sunday, April 19, 2009

One of the most beautiful sights in Italy is the little town of Assisi. Known as the birthplace of Italy’s patron saint, St. Francis, Assisi is a feast for the eyes with it Roman ruins, narrow winding streets, and walls of cascading flowers. The town boasts breathtaking views of central Italy. On the day I was there this spring, we looked out on miles of vineyards, lush gardens, and medieval villages.It was in this idyllic setting that St. Francis grew up with all the privileges of family wealth. As a very young man, Francis turned his back on his inheritance and committed his life to God. He practiced a life of simplicity, poverty, and humility before God. With a devout respect for all that God created, Francis showed compassion for the poor, the sick, and all of God’s creatures. His remains are at the beautiful Basilica of St. Francis in the heart of the town. The "Prayer of St. Francis," while probably not authored by him, certainly embodies his spirit of simplicity.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace,
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
here there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy;

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

The words reveal what it really means to be a Christian: to be an instrument of God's peace. If we become active in our Christianity, we will put the needs of others before ourselves. We’ll be the love, forgiveness, faith, hope, light, and joy to others. The prayer is that we will be less concerned with getting and more concerned with giving. Following the example of Christ’s death and resurrection to new life, we too should die to self and find eternal life through our Heavenly Father.

This week let’s think about situations that require us to be love forgiveness, faith, hope, light, and joy to someone. Let's be an instrument of God's peace. Then let’s feel the peace and blessing our risen Lord.

To listen to a contemporary musical version of the prayer, click on this link.http://www.recoverytimes.com/stfrancis.html

27,000 Sunrises

Monday, April 13, 2009

Christ has risen! He has risen indeed!

It was early in the morning when Mary Magdalene discovered that Jesus’ body was missing from the tomb. What a morning of emotions as her sorrow turned to joy when Jesus appeared to her and called her by name. At sunrise on that morning Mary Magdalene recognized Jesus.

Beginning that morning, Jesus appeared to a smattering of his followers. Each failed to recognize him until he revealed himself in a way that cast away their doubt. You see, Jesus met them where they were. He spoke to their individual concerns. Then it was up to each individual to respond.

Mary Magdalene was crying outside the tomb when Jesus appeared to her. She thought he was a gardener. Then Jesus called her name, “Mary.” She heard and believed.

The disciples, fearing the Jews, had locked themselves in a house. When Jesus appeared, he calmed their fears as he stood in the midst of them and said, “Peace to you.” But it wasn’t until he showed them his nail-pierced hands and side that they rejoiced. They saw and believed.

Thomas needed more. It was not until he put his finger in the nail holes that he was able to say, “My Master, My God!” He touched and believed.

Simon Peter needed even more. After an unsuccessful night of fishing, Peter and his disciple friends fell asleep very disappointed. The next morning Jesus appeared on the shore, unrecognized. He told them to throw the net on the other side of the boat. All of a sudden there were so many fish that they couldn’t pull them in. After experiencing this miracle, Peter acknowledged Jesus, “It’s the Master!” Peter experienced and believed.

Aren’t their experiences much like ours? Some of us are like Mary Magdalene. We need a tender voice of comfort in our sorrow. We need to hear Jesus. Jesus whispers our name and says,
“I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.” John 14:18

Some of us are like the disciples, gripped by fear – fear of the unknown, fear of what others say about us. Maybe we’re “locked” in emotionally. We need to see Jesus working in our lives. We need to Jesus says
“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give unto you; not as the world gives, do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful. “ John 14:27

Some of us are like Thomas. We doubt and become skeptical. We hear what good things God is doing for others but don’t believe it will happen in our own lives. We need to touch God. We need for God to move mountains in order for us to believe. Jesus says,
"I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him." Mark 11:23

Then some of us are like Simon Peter. We may have a history of highs and lows in our relationship with Christ. We may have praised him in one minute and denied him in the next. Or maybe we’re in a rut and like the disciples, our net comes up empty. We need to experience Jesus in a mighty way. Jesus says,
“It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners. “ Mark 2:17

Jesus meets us where we are. Whether we need to hear, to see, to touch, or to experience Jesus, he has promised to be near. He will reveal himself to us. Will we recognize him? Will we respond to him?

If you live to age 75, you will experience over 27,000 sunrises. Jesus will appear at all of them. On how many mornings will you recognize him? Like his early followers, all we have to do is accept and believe.